The Secret CV of Kapil Sibal

Kapil Sibal is undoubtedly the blue eyed boy (?).The fact that he handles (?) so many ministries shows the trust that both Sonia and Manmohan have in him. However I feel that his full potential is not being exploited. Are Sonia and Manmohan underestimating Kapil or are they genuinely ignorant of his capabilities? Either case, it is my duty to enlighten them about Kapil’s capabilities. I have managed to lay my hands on Kapil’s CV. I am presenting the same for the benefit of Sonia and Manmohan:

                                                                 

Name	Kapil Denial Sibal
Address for official purposes	19, Teen Murti Marg, New Delhi
Address for practical purposes	C/O. NDTV, New Delhi
Educational Qualification	·     LLM from Harvard School ·     Specialized in Law of Denial from Sonia School of Suppression ·     Doctorate in Applied Mathematics of Equating the Unequal
Current Position	·     Enviable ·     Minister for Science and Technology ·     Minister for Human Resources Development (after Arjun Singh was removed) ·     Minister for Telecommunication (after A Raja was removed)
Looking forward to	·     Corruption by other Ministers so that he can occupy their position ·     A barber who specializes in cutting eyebrows.
Normal Achievements	·     As HRD Minister, damaged the CBSE beyond repair. Special features of this damage are- o    Do Class- X students write exams? Well, they can, if they want to; they don’t need to, if they don’t want to; they have to, if they want admission in other schools for Class-XI. o    Do they get marks? No, they get grades. 91 is equal 98 is equal to Grade A! (Equating inequalities!) ·     As Communications Minister, o    he proved that Rs. 1.76 lakh cr.= Zero. o    in the same breath he also proved that Rs. 655 cr. = Rs. 5 cr.
Unique Achievements	·     Never handled Law Ministry, the subject in which he did his Masters.
Hobbies	·     Receiving Babas in the Airport. ·     Tricking them to write unsigned notes in closed rooms. ·     Diluting Lokpal Bill thinner than water and air. ·     “Brow”beating!
References	·     A Raja, C/O Tihar Jail, Delhi ·     Suresh Kalmadi, C/O Tihar Jail, Delhi
Strengths	·     Ability to be consistently incorrigible. ·     Absolute shamelessness.
Hates	·     Obviously, truth.
Worried about	·     Competition from Jayanti Natarajan, Digvijay Singh and Manish Tiwari in shamelessness.